Thursday, February 18, 2010

More power!!! or, When you have a hammer, everything looks like a nail

posted Fri, 19 Aug 2005

Never again will these words cross my lips: “Oh, I don’t need that much power. My yard/project/house isn’t that big.”

I have been a fool. A big fool, I tell you.

I left work early today because the server crashed or something really, really awful happened and oh dear, we couldn’t get onto the network, which meant no email, no access to anything. I mean nothing. All my work is on the E: drive (or somewhere like that). They make us put it there so they can back it up every night. Don’t save it on your hard drive, they warn us.

Live by the sword, die by the sword.

After a few minutes of waiting to see if it would come back up – I kept hitting F9 as if that would really make a difference, I announced I had better things to do and I left. I really cannot work if I do not have access to email or the network. Promise.

So I came home and decided to get an early start on my chores so I could spend tomorrow indulging in the movies. The grass really needed to be cut, so I got the Toro weedeater out of the basement. It was only puttering along. I thought it might be my extension cord. The frayed part needed to be re-wrapped with duct tape, so I did that. But it continued to be slow. I know that electricity doesn’t get slow. I did get an ‘A’ in physics, even if it was self-paced and not real physics. Then I noticed the smoke coming from the motor and the weird smell.

Rats. The motor was burning out.

One of the things I miss the most from living in Chile is that you can get things fixed. I even noticed it in Morocco. The strap on my sandal broke. Here, I can get a shoe repaired, but I have to leave it with the cobbler for a week and it will cost me $10. In Rabat, it was done the same day and cost $1.

I can’t imagine where I would go in M’town to have a weedeater repaired. I still haven’t found someone who will sharpen the blades on my lawnmower. I’ve been looking for three years.

So it was off to Home Depot, the only public place I will go looking like a total slob. I was in the middle of a project – no time to shower and change just to get dirty and sweaty again.

I didn’t want another Toro. My gosh – that one was only two years old. The salesman showed me a Black and Decker. It was the model I’d turned down the last time – I didn’t need 14” trim! My goodness! I have a tiny lawn! I cut my grass with a weedeater! How much power do I need?

But it was this or the Toro. I was in a hurry. I didn’t feel like spending a lot of time.

I took it.

Oh. My. Gosh.

Can I tell you how wonderful it is to have a lot of power in your hands?

This is why men get excited about power tools!

This is the big deal!

Compared to the Black and Decker, the Toro was like cutting the grass using manicure scissors – one blade at a time.

I’m never going back. Now that I have tasted of macho, it’s maximum power for me. Give me that shot of testosterone, straight up.

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