Saturday, March 20, 2010

Passing the friends` test

posted Tue, 13 Jun 2006

It didn’t even occur to me that I was being inspected this weekend. Oh, sure, I knew Deb and Doug wanted to meet me. Doug is SH’s oldest friend. They go back to high school. But I was thinking of this as nothing more than a party and a chance for us to meet. Not as a kick the tires, make sure I am worthy, 14-point inspection. Just a hey, how ya’ doing, casual thing.

But as we drove back to Memphis on the Kentucky Parkway on Sunday, SH mentioned something casually about how Friday’s dinner with Heather and the other Doug had been just for my benefit. I wasn’t really paying attention – I was trying to figure out which state had produced the most presidents. (Is it Ohio? Does anyone know? I do wish SH had a wireless internet connection in his car.) His comment almost slipped past me. “What do you mean, for my benefit?” I asked.

“Doug and Deb really needed to get the kids to bed and get ready for the party, but Heather and Doug wanted to meet you,” he said.

“Why?” I asked. I had never heard of Heather and Doug #2 before the weekend, so had assumed they had never heard of me.

But this was not the case. Doug #2 had also been in Doug #1’s wedding along with SH and, as it turns out, is a good friend of SH’s. They, along with a few others, had been hearing about me. SH has never taken a chick to this party before in all the years he has been attending. Everyone was quite curious. Who was I?

I had no idea of the buzz I had created.

“Well, did I pass?” I asked. I had been exhausted on Friday and had gotten up early from the supper table to start doing the dishes. (Early as in after we were done eating but while the grown ups were still talking.) You know – so I could go to bed. I had no idea those people were there just to see me! None!!! I had no idea I was supposed to sit around and make conversation with them until late. Especially as it was already 8:30 and Deb had said she was going to have the kids in the tub by 8:00 and she didn’t mean maybe. SH could have warned me to act like someone nice and hospitable instead of myself.

“I’ve been inspected by your friends!” he laughed.

“What are you talking about?”

“When we went to Austin! And Houston! And in Memphis!” he answered. He could have added Chicago and Louisville, but held back. He knows when to stop. He’s also seeing the light on the death tax just because he’s been told there might be certain consequences he wouldn’t like if he doesn’t.

But I digress.

“Oh, that,” I said dismissively. “Not really. We didn’t go to Austin just for you to meet my friends. I went to Austin to visit and you went along.” Not that he had any trouble passing, even though he wasn’t being tested. Both Anita and Laura have warned me I’d better not break up with SH or else I’ll have them to deal with. He has friends in high places.

“So did I pass?”

“Of course you did.”

But I don’t know. There is this woman, Beth, who brought SH about two pounds of brownies and they are almost as good as mine. I think she might have her eye on him. We’ll see what happens. Will she be invited to the party next year? Why was she invited this year? I am very suspicious.

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