Sunday, March 21, 2010

Which is why peace in the Middle East will be very difficult

posted Thu, 15 Jun 2006

[I don't have the photo any more, but imagine two trash cans on the sidewalk. Proceed.]

This is the view from my front porch. You are looking at my white-trash neighbors’ house. Notice the garbage bin on the sidewalk? It’s Thursday. Trash day is Monday. City ordinance says that you are supposed to put the bin out after 5:00 on Sunday and bring it back in before Monday night, but these neighbors leave it on the sidewalk all week long.

Why? Because they are lazy trust fund brats, that’s why. (They don’t even mow their own yard. Their Christmas lights are still up.) They don’t care if they get fined, I suppose, because daddy pays it. The family to the west had to put double-paned windows in their house because they (the white trash kids) are so noisy. They stay up all night long with their friends, making noise and playing music. You can do that when you don’t have to work for a living. (This is the only valid argument for the estate tax that SH has presented me – to prevent trust-fund brats. Unfortunately, most trust-fund brats are created while their parents are still alive, so an estate tax would still not prevent these people. We have to count on their own stupidity to eradicate them.)

Yes, I am in general against the government telling people what to do, but remember, the rule is that people can do what they want as long as they don’t hurt anyone else. Leaving a trash can out is an eyesore that affects my enjoyment of my property and affects my property values. It’s small, but it’s something that we as a community have decided is important. We have standards about how we will do things. You can’t run around naked, you can’t leave your car up on blocks, you can’t run a business out of your house in most neighborhoods. It’s how things are done. If you don’t like it, change the statutes.

But they still leave their trash can out so they have room for their four, sometimes five cars in their driveway. Four cars – for two people. Sheesh.

So I have been able to get a little bit of revenge this week. Small revenge, to be sure, but revenge nonetheless.

When their many slacker friends come over, they park in front of my house. They don’t bother to park in front of the white trash house, no, they park in front of my house. Now, it’s not like I am using the space in front of my house, but you know, there is space in front of the white trash house. Why not use it? Why do they have to park in front of my house? What if my friends come over? Where are they supposed to park?

But with SH’s car here this week, I have had a car parked in front of my house. And I’ve made sure it’s been parked smack dab in the middle of the front of my house so there’s not room for someone to park in front or in back of it. If done properly, there’s room for two cars to park in front of my house, but if done really properly, only one can be there and leave room for me to get into the driveway. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Take that, lazy, trash-can-leaving, parking-space-stealing, noisy, oxygen-stealing Paris-Hilton wannabes.

(I moved SH’s car into the carport this morning – that’s why it’s not in the photo.)

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