posted Mon, 20 Nov 2006
So when you’re completing the paperwork at your new seasonal part-time job and you are reading one of the dozens of papers in that work, it’s probably not a good idea, upon spying a funny language mistake (“When answering the phone, be sure to do so in a professional manor…”), to point out said mistake to the HR manager.
Especially when she doesn’t get it.
She just nods her head and says that yes, we are to answer the phone in a professional manner.
That’s when you should just drop the subject, but no, you, being a stupid idiot who never ever wants to work again, persist. “No!” you laugh. “I mean this!” as you point to the offending word. You think it’s funny – ha! ha! – and are sure she’ll think it’s funny as well. It hasn’t even crossed your stupid mind that perhaps she is the one who typed the document.
She looks at the word and then looks at you blankly.
It’s then that you realize that you two are truly not on the same page. And that you are digging your own grave. But it’s too late. You are forced to explain. So you do.
“You know, only answer the phone in a big English country house! Ha ha!”
She smiles tightly. “No one else has ever noticed that before,” she tells you. She is not saying it in a “aren’t you the clever girl” way. She is saying it in a, “I’ll get you my pretty” way – in a “You’ll be working at 11:00 Christmas Eve or I’ll know the reason why” way.
Why oh why can’t you learn to keep your big fat mouth shut?
The end of the line
11 months ago