posted Sun, 21 Jan 2007
At the bar at The Bistro last night, which was the only place to eat if you didn’t have a reservation, due to the monster truck pull at the FedEx Forum.
Bartender [to the dressed-up late 30’s couple that sat next to SH and me. The woman put her purse in SH’s space.]: Hi. Are you folks here for supper?
Man: Yes. I was here for New Year’s Eve last year. This is a different menu.
Bartender: Well, that was a while ago and it was a special menu. I’m Chris, the other bartender is also Chris, and there’s a Gretchen floating around.
Man: It must get confusing at Chris mas!
Bartender [strained smile]: Yes sir. What can I get you folks to drink?
Woman: Do you have any merlot?
Bartender: Yes, these three here on the wine list.
Woman: I don’t like anything too bitter or dry.
Bartender: Try this.
Woman [wrinkles cute little nose]: Oooh. Too bitter. I don’t like it.
Bartender: OK. What about this one?
Woman [shakes carefully coiffed little head]: I don’t like that one either.
Man: She doesn’t like anything too bitter or too dry.
Bartender: This is the last merlot. What do you think?
[Gay couple to their left watches carefully; SH and I watch; bartender watches.]
Woman: I don’t like that either.
Woman: Those potatoes with the duck – is it possible to substitute something else, like green beans?
Bartender: Well, the way they make this dish, it’s a composed dish, it’s built up, so technically I suppose they could, but it wouldn’t be as pretty. I’d have to ask the kitchen. [The Bistro is run by a pretty famous Memphis chef. He probably doesn’t like to have his creations messed with.]
Me to SH: She doesn’t eat any carbs! How boring is that?!
He orders first and does not order for her. Rude, rude, rude. Not saying the guy should order for the woman these days -- some women don't like that -- but he should at least let her order first. It is what gentlemen do.
Man: What do you want for dessert? That pecan pie looks really great!
Woman: I’m not going to have dessert. I’ll just have some of yours.
Man: Why don’t you just get a dessert?
Woman: I don’t want dessert. I’ll just have some of yours.
Man: But why don’t you just order your own?
Marriage 501, Lecture 823: Who cleans the vomit?
9 hours ago