Thursday, May 6, 2010

My city was gone

posted Sat, 03 Mar 2007

I came home to discover SH had done the grocery shopping, which is a wonderful thing, but then I discovered he had taken my Salmonella-Honey-Roasted Peter Pan back to Shnuck’s and replaced it with natural peanut butter with no sugar, no additives, and no flavor.

SH does not like peanut butter and does not eat it – it is on the List of Foods He Will Not Touch Even Though He Eats Tripe Which Is One Of The Most Foul Things In The Universe – so I asked him very carefully why he had gotten it instead of the regular kind. After all, the man had done me a favor.

I think the salmonella gave the Honey-Roasted Peter Pan that little extra zing. I miss it.

“I figured you didn’t want the natural peanut butter because it costs more,” he said.

“Nooooooo,” I answered slowly.

“But with the natural kind, there are no trans fats,” he argued.

“Like I care about that.”

“But this is better for you! It doesn’t have all those preservatives and additives!”

I had to blurt it out. “Natural peanut butter tastes like crap! It’s awful! I like the preservatives and the transfats.”

He sighed and rolled his eyes. “Fine. We can return it tomorrow. I still have the receipt.”

It’s amazing the man ever tries to do anything for me.

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