My sister, Jenny: I won’t be able to plan a bridal shower and party for you in two and a half months.
Me: That’s OK. I didn’t want to wear penis barrettes anyhow.
Jenny: You don’t even want a shower?
Me: Nope. We’re shacking up.* We’re just going to have a small, quick ceremony to make it legal. No parties.
* We’re shacking up because of Wisconsin divorce law (we could not legally marry until June 4) and the timing of SH’s lease (we had to be out of his apartment by June 30, we had to give two months’ notice, and they would not let us have a month-to-month option, so we had to, had to, had to have a house by the end of April, which meant selling my house way before that), but that does not change the fact that we are shacking up. We’d be married already but the parents want to attend a ceremony so we’re giving them one in Sept. Small, immediate family only. Maybe we’ll go to a Brewer’s game to celebrate. (We couldn’t have an earlier ceremony because 1) we were moving at the end of May, 2) SH wanted to go to Summerfest at the end of June, and 3) SH has a bunch of work travel between now and Sept.)